Thursday, August 27, 2009

MALIBU KARAOKE BATTLE: Kid Rock vs Zuma Dogg (Kid Rock STUNNED as he is asked to hand mic over to LOCAL FAVORITE, "Zuma Dogg" (ZD BLEW HIM OFF STAGE!)

Last night was fun in Malibu as Zuma Dogg bumps KID ROCK off the karaoke stage and ROCK is forced to hand the mic off to DOGG! (This ain't DE-TROIT, KID ROCK...YOU'RE IN ZD'S HOME TOWN...THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU...GIMME THE MIC AND SHUT UP, FOOL!:

Yes, Zuma Dogg felt so good after last night's Valley City Council Candidate forum, he wanted to reward his campaign helper/driver with a good time to celebrate, so we took the campaign victory party to Malibu for the UPSCALE karaoke experience.

As I am walking in and handing in my karaoke slip to the DJ, WITHIN SECONDS, the first person runs up to me, slaps me on the back and says, "Zuma Dogg! You're a LEGEND!" (I know, but it never hurts to walk in a place and get that reaction within seconds.)

So yeah, the BIG news was ZD stopped by for an unannounced reunion appearance with my old Malibu constituents who lost me to L.A. over the past three years.

The place was packed with an older, upscale crowd of Malibu movers and shakers.

I has no choice other than to open with Bee Gees, "You Should Be Dancing" because you gotta go with the encore, FIRST, when you have a packed house who has been suffering through non-superstar level performers, like ZD.

And like shooting fish in a barrel, the crowd busts out into a New Year's Eve level party.

Well, it's tough to top the Bee Gees, believe it or not with a mass crowd, so even though I was kinda tired from the long day and forum, HAD TO STEP UP AND BUST OUT...


That's BOLD, y'all! (Especially for a guy who looks like mild-mannered, clean shaven, executive middle aged guy.)

Well, everyone outside on the patio comes streaming inside and the dance floor gets packed, and I have to complain to the crowd, "I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH ROOM TO MOONWALK, Y'ALL...GET OUTTA THE WAY."

So of course they had to make way to relive the memories of Motown 25, in the 80's when Michael busted it out for the first time, himself. (The floor was really smooth, and it was one of my best "Moonwalks" EVER, so that was cool!)

Of course I have to greet the crowd with all the handshakes and back slaps and hear how amazing it was...but these two African American dudes were REALLY blown away and made sure to give me the "handshake/half-hug" and REALLY let me know how that was "No joke" of a performance and really honored the original.

Then Sean Penn, Kid Rock, Jeremy Piven come strolling in, but better than that, Lauren Sanchez from Fox 11 was there with friends and MAN does SHE light up the room and have fun! I LOVED HER!

Sean Penn, who ain't the nicest guy as you may have heard, was perfectly fine walking into a packed bar, open to the public and he was smiling and laughing and having a good time. Nice to see that.

So ZD was waiting for his next song, cause even though Kid Rock was there, other ZD fans were pestering the DJ asking him, "When's it Zuma's turn again."

So the DJ tells me I'm next. I'm ready...but then, KID ROCK decides he wants to sing, right then.

And since HE'S "Kid Rock," he couldn't even wait one more song, even though he had been hanging out for over ninety minutes, or whatever.

BUT HERE'S THE PROBLEM: Kid Rock is know to "hold the mic." Meaning, last time he showed up, he "held the mic" for a 90 minute karaoke concert for the crowd that went till 3am.


YES, I was starting to get cranky. And as I was noting that, "Damn, bro...I waited this long, and have been coming here for years, and years through thick and thin when NO ONE was here...and all the times you asked me to come to help out...AND YA THREW ME UNDER THE BUS!

He assured me that if Rock put down the mic, ZD would be next.

So "Sweet Home Alabama" kicks in, and I'm thinking, "It's OVER!" I may as well have left and was getting ready to leave. But by the time I was able to make it through the crowd to say "Goodbye" to people...Kid Rock was wrapping up.

And I must add, I think Kid Rock IS INDEED, VERY talented in his own way, and he's got a good voice and good performance persona, as we all know...and I LIKE Kid Rock.

But, MAN...he was LUKEWARM. If you didn't know he was "Kid Rock" you probably just would have been marking time till the next singer.

So when he was done, not that big a response as you would expect. Kinda no biggie. So he's standing there, looking around as to whether he should do another one, or just hand the mic back for the next person. So the crowd was luke warm, they weren't going NUTZ, he kinda takes the mic, is looking what to do...

AND THE DJ SAYS, "Kid Rock, Zuma Dogg wants to sing a song now...can you give the mic to Zuma and let him do a song?"



You just said, "Hey Kid Rock, Zuma Dogg wants to sing one, can you give him the mic."


Kid Rock didn't know who the REAL superstar was to the crowd in that room: BIG ZD FROM THE 2nd CD!

So yes, Zuma Dogg walked over to Kid Rock (he's just Bob to me, y'all), AND HE HAD TO HAND THE MIC OVER TO "THE REALEST." (That was the harshest, most bitter mic hand off EVER! It was like he wanted to STAB me with the mic, LOL!)

Meanwhile, the kid ran out the door like a big crybaby...and Zuma Dogg IMMEDIATELY goes into, "Hoooody Hoooooo, It's UNCLE MC ZUMA DOGG and go into the full DJ VOICE/PUMP UP ROUTINE, just RUBBING IT IN HIS FACE ON HIS WAY OUT THE DOOR, I bust out into "Born To Run," the crowd was singing along, everyone jumping around blowing the roof off the place...and for that ONE MAGICAL MOMENT...ZUMA DOGG GOT TO STEAL THE SHOW FROM KID ROCK AND BLOW HIM OFF THE STAGE!

He went back to his mansion and money and posse suffering his first defeat and I woke up without a cent: But for all his Award Show appearances and stadiums sold out, he stormed out the door like a crybaby loser being pushed off the stage for YOUR next Los Angeles City Councilmember!

[PLEASE FEEL FREE TO DOUBT THE VALIDITY OF THIS MOST BOLD CLAIM THAT I'M SURE SOUND DELUSIONAL. IT'S SO TRUE, IT'S EVEN BETTER THAN I DESCRIBED HERE. Cause part of the whole vibe is that Kid Rock probably was wondering why so many people were coming up to me and reacting that way to me and especially a lot of women that he probably couldn't figure out why they were all walking up so happy to see me. I AM SO SERIOUS WHEN I SAY SEAN PENN AND KID ROCK WERE OBSERVING THE ACTION, CAUSE THE WOMEN WHO WERE GREETING ME WERE CERTAINLY WORTH OBSERVING. (Yes, sit there an try to figure out the magic DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE TO ME EITHER.)

HEY KID ROCK...CALL ME ANYTIME IF YOU WANT A REMATCH. I'LL BLOW YOU OFF THE STAGE ANY DAY, ANY NIGHT, ANY TIME. But that's cool. You're still good, too! (But don't get it twisted when we're both in the room at the same time.)

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Zuma Speaks!

Been busy on the campaign trail, lots of catching up to do including some big street talk on the Federal Investigation into City Hall and LAUSD boardmembers.

ZUMA DOGG LOVES MICHAEL HIGBY, STILL: Just to squash any potential gossip regarding Zuma Dogg and the Mayor Sam bloggers, Michael is too good a guy and I like him too much to be able to be mad at over all the shenanigans that has been happening while he has been busy having a life outside the blog. The blog is his hobby, y'all...not his whole life like Zuma Dogg -- and I think he is getting screwed by the people he was gracious enough to allow some added latitude and responsiblity, and they weren't ready for it. Personally, I know times are tough, and
I've heard some people are getting snappier like Zuma Dogg recently. So believe it or not, that makes me feel a little better about some of the treatment I have been getting from these people. And I have even more empathy for them and if I see 'em around town as an activist, I will be happy to see them, as usual. But they may or may not want that. But Higby is in his own separate league in many ways including being "The Blogfather" because he started his most influential blog over 5 years ago. So that make him the forefather of local political blogging in my mind, and you can only love the guy. I DON'T KNOW HOW HE GETS AWAY WITH IT. After a few rounds of emails between ZD and Michael addressing the issues of ZD on the blog, we just called each other and talked to each other and I think we'll be back to old times with each other. IT'S NOT ABOUT WHO THE GUY ENDORSES...In the case of Michael, I don't want this election season stuff to come between us, and I think he is happy to feel the same way. So if nothing else, I'm not gonna let two renegade bloggers take rob ZD of being able to chit
chat and share stuff we hear and all the fun we try to have along the way. Cause here's something fun that may create some fun ZD/Mayor Sam co-blogging:

ZUMA DOGG FOR CITY COUNCIL, The Reality Shoot: Yes, it's true...I was so excited about this, I had to call Higby right away to tell him the feud has to be off, because this is gonna be too fun and we've come too far to fall apart at the finish line: You may remember a month ago a reality crew showed up at City Hall to film some Zuma Dogg for an upcoming TV idea that wasn't originally supposed to be about ZD (there was already a host and they had a concept), but they felt ZD was perfect for the political reality show concept. So they took the cameras to shoot some test stuff. It took a while for them to edit it, cause they work on other stuff and had to do it in between. But they already showed it to some people (HEY DUDE, I WAS WAITING TO SEE IT
FIRST!), AND, bottom line, just got a call, "Zuma Dogg, it's 'Mr. Video Shoot Guy'. Did you make it on the ballot and are you running for city council? I told him yes, and he said that was good because they want to shoot the "Zuma Dogg For City Council" pilot show with a pro-crew, starting....PROBABLY MONDAY. They are in a hurry, and withthe campaign rolling, the time is now. So you may see some boom mics and tripods at some of the next CD2 Candidate forums. And hopefully we can make it out to the Watermelon Festival and other fun events this
election season. DETAILS TO COME.

ZUMA DOGG COCKTAIL EVENT: Mark your calendars for Thursday September 17th for the Zuma Dogg Nightclub Cocktail party with Matt Dowd on guitar. More to come, but now maybe the reality crew will be covering it, too. If you want to buy a $20 ticket (FREE open bar and
appetizers), call ZD, send an email or ask me for one when you see me.

Zuma Dogg was at the Sunland Tujunga CD2 City Council forum and declares David Saltsburg the clear winner of the forum. People said, "He was the only world class candidate up there." And a lot of people were buzzing over the things he was saying and I saw one 90 year old
community member tell Mr. Saltsburg, "I admire what you were saying up there. You were the only one up there telling it like it is." Other people were seen congratulating the candidate including people who worked for some of the other candidates. One of them told David that,
"You struck the right tone, people loved you and I made the decision that you're gonna do it! I can see it." In an exclusive interview with CD 2 Candidate David Saltsburg, he tells Zuma Dogg, I feel good about it and feel I showed up and delivered as I had hoped to. You never know how these things are going to go, but I at least feel good that I remembered to say a lot of the things that I wanted to say and got it out." Saltsburg added, "If I didn't make it to the debate, or didn't
perform as well as I had hoped in my mind, it would have been over as far as any real chance of making it into a run-off. But it went well enough yesterday that I feel momentum now and can't wait for the next events Hope I can make them all. I did so well, it made this one blogger go nuts and post a whole bunch of mean-spirited, out of context and flat out misrepresentations on a popular blog after the event as she saw her friend's candidacy officially come to an end
yesterday. And, YES, it DID!"

DONATE TO ZUMA DOGG: Need PayPal donations to keep the ZD machine moving today and this week. It's HARD TIMES, y'all...I'm hangin' in there and made it to the debate yesterday clean shaven and in a suit and had a great time. But without going too crazy now that I am a don't have to send me $500 like other candidates ask for, but I could use $10 or $20 just to make it through the evening and tomorrow morning. I feel good, but need help, really.

ZUMA DOGG FOR CITY COUNCIL: If you don't like David Saltsburg even though everyone else does because he is too conservative and slick in his clean cut haircut, nice suit and good answers and want something a little more "in your face" and over the top, Zuma Dogg is also on the ballot. He is know as a guy who has shown up to a bunch of the council meetings to speak out and stand up to the corruption and a lot of people tune into the council meetings to see what he has to say on the issue.


Thursday, August 6, 2009

Is Federal Investigation of LAUSD School Board Members Heading Toward UTLA and Signature Gathering Fraud?

SUMMARY: UTLA and Sue Burnside (who worked on Jose Huizar's City Council campagin) are at the heart of a Federal probe regarding collusion and fraud that Zuma Dogg hears is running rampant between the two. Burnside does a whole hell of a bunch of UTLA campaigns -- and does the Independent Expenditures (I.E.) for UTLA.

Zuma Dogg feels that these are some of the things to consider regarding the Federal Grand Jury Investigation into LAUSD boardmembers, L.A. City Councilmember Jose Huizar and what we may expect to see next regarding this Federal matter.

And first of all, the L.A. Times story about Tokofsky and Huizar taking $30,000 as consultants when they were sitting on LAUSD school board AIN'T THE KINDA THING THAT TRIGGERS A FEDERAL INVESTIGATION.

So ZD and the circle of people he is vetting information with regarding this story are not sure exactly where it will end up going, or what the consultancy fees will end up leading to, but we all agree...IT AIN'T ABOUT THE $30,000 CONSULTANCY FEES!

So from here on in, I'll simply be sharing the tidbits I have been hearing, here and there, as the small circle of ZD insiders on this matter help paint out a possible picutre. BUT AGAIN, this is MY speculation, based on everything I have heard over the past three years as an LAUSD watcher; and more recently the stuff I have heard regarding the signature gathering of Sue Burnside & ASSociates during the LAUSD board race with Ben Austin.


Like all the hardcore politically shadiness, dare I say corruption, it's a tangled web. And I am sleep deprived and don't have enough nutrients in my system, so it's harder to focus and concentrate, so I will tell this one piece at a time. Here it goes:

Hey Sue Burnside & ASSociates...way to run a political signature gathering business...

FIRST OF ALL, look at this list of Sue Burnside & Associate clients.

Gil Cedillo for U.S. Congress

Curren Price for Senate, IE

Eric Garcetti for LA City Council

Martin Heinrich, NM1, DCCC

Measure H, Beverly Hills Hilton

Harry Teague, NM CD2, DCCC

Pasadena School Bond

Atlas Project

Coalition to Protect California's Budget & Economy

LaMotte for LAUSD Board


CA Democratic Party

Joe Baca for Congress

Hooley for Congress

Michael Furer for Assembly

Laura Richardson for Assembly

Chuck Calderon for Assembly

Ron Calderon Senate

Monica Garcia for School Board.

Jose Huizar for LA City Council

Bob Hertzberg for LA Mayor

DNC, OR, NM and CA


New Mexico Dem Party, Kerry for Pres

America Votes

Move On: National vote by mail program

Moving America Forward

Coalition for a Better Colorado

Mike Machado for Senate

CA Alliance for Tom Umberg, 69 AD

Joe Baca Jr. for CA Assembly

Josie Gonzales for S.B. Supervisor

Graham Richard for Mayor, Ft Wayne IN

Martin Ludlow for LA City Council

Santa Monica Malibu School District Bond

Forward Oregon, Democratic Party

John Lauritzen for LA School Board (2003 & 2007)

New Mexico Democratic Party (2002 &'00)

Indiana Democratic Party, JLT

California Democratic Party

NRDC, grassroots organizing for AB 1058

Lois Capps, CA 23CD

Linda Sanchez, CA 39CD

LAUSD Prop. "K", School Bond

Llyod Levine for Assembly, 40thAD

Wendy Greuel for 2nd City Council (02,03)

Carson Unified Formation, No on D

No on D, A, E & S - Prohibition of Fireworks

Tom LaBonge for City Council (9/11/01 & 03)

Diane Watson, CA 32nd CD, Special

Marlene Canter for School Board

New Mexico Democratic Party, Gore

Gloria Negrete McLeod for Assembly, 61AD

League of Conservation Voters (CD 27 & 36)

Jack Scott for CA Senate (Primary & General)

Carol Liu for CA Assembly (2000 & 2002)

Handgun Control - Utah

Proposition 1A

Nell Soto for Senate, Special Election

Congressman Joe Baca, Special Election

Huntington Beach Union High School

Coalition for Kids, Hayes for School Board

DCCC, 1998 CA 9 Congressional Targets

Washington State Democratic Party

Tom Udall for Congress, New Mexico, ‘98

Yes on 5, CA Indians for Self- Reliance

San Diego School Bond MM

HRC-Protect Our Constitution, HI & CA Project

AFL-CIO, Gloria Romero for Assembly

Loretta Sanchez for Congress, 98 & 00

Montebello School Bond

Lois Capps, Special Election

Proposition L, L.A. County Library Tax

Proposition E, L.A. County Firefighters Tax

Angelenos for Better Classrooms (BB), LAUSD Bond

TASIN, Indian Rally at Federal Court

South Bay Voter Registration Program

Bob Hertzberg, 40th AD

Congresswoman Jane Harman, 36 CD (96,00,02)

Assembly Member, Senator Sheila Kuehl, 41AD

Assembly Member, Senator Debra Bowen, 53 AD

State Senator Ralph Dills, 26 SD

Proposition 1, Expand Police Stations

Hollywood Park Expansion, Inglewood

South Bay Voter Registration

Senator Roberti, NO on the RECALL

Proposition C, San Diego North County

No on RAND, Petition Drive, Santa Monica

Laura Chick, L.A. City Council, # 3

Southern California Voter Registration

No on 174, No on School Vouchers

S.O.S., Utility Workers of America, P.U.C.

Judy Abdo, Mayor of Santa Monica

West Hollywood, Yes on the Sheriff

John Emerson, 40th AD Special Election

Community Outreach/Grass Tops

LAUSD Bond Measure Q

Woodside Natural Gas

Education Station

Waste Management


LAUSD Internal Stakeholder


Direct Impact

NRDC Action Fund/ CLCV

Huntington Beach Union High School

L.A. City Redistricting Commission

Pasadena School Bond

L.A. County Bond - Measure R

TNT Fireworks

Land Use

Playa Vista

Beverly Hills Hilton

Westfield Malls

Woodside Natural Gas

Cascade Historical Ranch, San Mateo

Hilllwood/ Hofer Ranch, Ontario CA

LAUSD Community Outreach, New School

City Of Cathedral City

Huntington Beach Union High School

L.A. School District New Facilities

Pacific Design Center

Sunset Millennium, L.L.C.

So not exactly a chump change company.

But you know what? I would trust Zuma Dogg and his un-professional signautre gathering helpers more than Sue Burnside & Associates.

First of all, according to this Superior Court complaint filed on behalf of Ben Austin vs Burnside and Urteaga, Burnside hired (subcontracted) Robert Urteaga to supervise the signature gathering effort on behalf of Ben Austin, who hired the presitgious firm to complete and verify the 500 signatures needed to get on the ballot for LASUD school board member to replace outgoing member Marlene Kanter. Turns out they made a mistake in the gathering process and Mr. Austin did not qualify for the ballot.

Now suffice it to say, ZD and all his "helpers" on this story agree, Mr. Austin was not exactly the most UTLA-friendly candidate, and Zuma Dogg will go one step further and say it's my opinion hardcore UTLA backers and supporters not only feared ABB (Anybody But Ben), but would be VERY DESPERATE to do ANYTHING to prevent him from winning.

But first, let's look at who Sue Burnside hires and puts in charge of these high level operations: Rober Urteaga: The un-beloved Montebello elected official and subject of a re-call campaign for pay-for-play and a convicted felon for Grand Theft and check fraud. AND BURNSIDE HIRES HIM. Recall Robert Urteaga blog

STORY: 1/31/08 - SAN BERNARDINO - A political consultant faces 19 perjury charges involving bogus signatures on a 2005 voter initiative.

San Bernardino County District Attorney Michael Ramos announced the charges against Joon Il Kim, 30, who is accused of signing affidavits on petitions declaring that he had witnessed each signature.

Kim was an independent political operative who contracted with Burnside & Associates, a Los Angeles political firm managing the petition drive for Pick Your Part Auto Recycling, based in Anaheim.

Wow...of all the people available in the city to help with this job, Burnside just CAN'T seem to find anyone but convicted felons (including for signature gathering itself) TO HELP GET SIGNATURES!!!

So that's the background cast of characters. Now look what happened:

a) Austin hires Burnside and somehow Urteaga ends up on the job. (After the fact, Burnside claims she knew nothing about it and was on vacation, on her honeymoon, completely outside of the range of ANY accountability...even though it's the middle of the biggest campaign season ever. THAT'S LIKE AN ACCOUNTANT TAKING A HONEYMOON THE FIRST TWO WEEKS IN APRIL!

b) Urteaga ACCIDENTALY makes a mistake and ends up gathering signatures from outside the district and candidate doesn't qualify to make it on the ballot.

c) According to the Superior Court Case, Austin was told the signautres were being verified and WERE verified (checked by the company) before they were turned in to the Clerk's office.

Ooops! Another "Burnside Bad!" They used the wrong program or something when they verified the signatures...that they got in the wrong area!

d) They turned the signatures in on the last day, so there would be no time for the clerks office to check them for mistakes in case they needed to go back out and get more.

DO YOU KNOW WHO TURNS IN SIGNATURES ON THE LAST DAY??? ZUMA DOGG DOES! Because he is out there getting them himself, or with a couple of voulenteer helpers -- and I blow the first two weeks not even getting them. SO ZUMA DOGG TURNS THEM IN ON THE LAST DAY FOR GOOD REASON. You mean to tell me the superstar signature gathering company of all time waits until the last minute to turn in the most important project they have going: THE LAUSD SCHOOL BOARD!!!



So knowing that UTLA was spending boatloads of cash to back Steve Zimmer, the long time UTLA teacher from Marshall High to BEAT Ben Austin in a desperate attempt to not lose the school board seat to someone endorsed by everyone UTLA HATES (like Villaraigosa and Eli Broad);


Did someone at UTLA pull some strings (drop some cash) to have Urteaga (either with, or without Burnside's knowledge) run a "Bad News Bear" bamboozle pattern on Austin's signature gathering effort? (Drop the ball on purpose?)

I spoke with some people on this possibility, and even though he may be a pain in the but, and be a HUGE part of the problem in the whole LAUSD picutre, people think AJ Duffy is a good guy and decent competitior (and wouldn't be dumb enough) to get mixed up in anything like that. And the people I speak with (even his haters) feel it's pretty hard to imagine that he would pull something so shady as paying someone for something like that.


People were not as quick to jump to your defense. PACE stands for Political Action Committe for Education (or something like that) and is the UTLA political action committee. UTLA can't spend money on campaigns becasue they are a non-profit organization. So PACE does the spending for them.

Is it possible someone from inside PACE had Urteaga (contracted under Burnside) to fumble the signatures and make sure Ben didn't make it onto the ballot?

I AM NOT SAYING THIS IS THE CASE: When I started this story, I told you I am vetting out this story and trying to project where the hockey puck is going in this story and thinking aloud as to some of the scenarios that could have played out.

So did someone, maybe someone from PACE broker some kind of deal with Burnside and/or Associates to purposefully throw the signature gathering campaign for UTLA-challenger Ben Austin?

And the part that I can't tell you is...I AIN'T GOING DOWN THIS PATH FOR NO REASON ALL ON MY OWN!

In other words, looks like some lazy politicians (see client list) are going to have to go out and get their own signatures next time, cause I think we may find one of them is gonna be shut down. AND THAT'S WHEN IT ALL UNRAVELS. When it's in L.A Times you'll believe me. And the significance of THIS political firm is that client list. WOW, imagine if Feds could get to that and take a peek around. AW YEA!

Alright, that's enough for now.